There might be red lipstick on my teeth.
I inwardly curse the lost chance to dash to the bathroom and grin wide into the mirror to check before sitting down with my improv teacher to talk show notes.
I’ve been in a rush of exuberance and whirls of heightened introspection since Tuesday night’s Level II performance. This rumbling energy shot my eager hand up high to go first for a one-on-one discussion with a teacher I madly respect, because I need to spill out reflections and questions on this spontaneous theatrical art form that energizes and intoxicates like a soul-mate.
Improv clicks all aspects of self into place.
All my struggles and all my natural talents, all my insecurities and joys, the way I live, the way I want to relate and create have found a hOMe on the improv stage.
I want this, y’all. I want improv the way most girls my age want a man.
I commit to you.
I see you and me as a separate entity, a relationship I must nurture and tend to by working on myself, and by working on myself, I continue to show up for you in love, understanding, openness, unconditional support.
You catalyze a recognition of my wholeness. No one makes us complete. We are complete on our own. People walk into our lives to galvanize a dormant aspect wide awake. I feel whole, vibrant, enough when I practice improv, when I perform. There’s a calmness, an enrichment, a meaning that breathes fresh vitality into my days that spin around the next class, the next show, the next performance.
You applaud my blaze. Yes, I know I am allowed to have moody days, but I’m more interested in how you handle my brilliance, my brightness, my light. And here, I can shine without apology, without dimming myself, I am liberated to be loud, lighthearted, emotional, reactionary, quick-witted, and also, to emerge with depth and with the desire to entice and bring out your shine, too. Your blaze lights me up, and this how we proceed – illuminated in our imperfections, our glories, and boundless energy.
I will move for you. You win my heart. I will go where the creative wind whispers to go to deepen my commitment, my adventure with you. New York, Chicago, LA where there are programs, and schools and I am listening and responding to what feels like effervescent ease.
As I sit to speak with my improv teacher (and run my tongue over my teeth like a vacuum desperate to catch lingering lipstick residue), I feel like I can finally, finally! talk about my crush to a person who understands this quirky, charismatic, complex creative I have chosen to rise in love with.
As we converse on notes from class and the show, and offering a suggestion on improvements, I deeply know that this feedback comes from LOVE, because it feels encouraging, all-embracing, a championing for grander expansion.
This reaffirms a purring epiphany that the improv community is “yogic.” There is action, intention fueling this theatrical culture of positivity, inclusion, connection and uplift of community.
The yoga world can be shadowed with ego-assana, posturing, a preaching of compassion lacking a genuine off-the-mat practice. In improv, there’s no time and there’s no stage space for fake. The lights go up and life gets real real fast. We’re illuminated in all of our defaults and insecurities and to contribute to the flow of the show we have to shed our expectations, agenda, our ego again and again to be the improv performer who plays to strengthen the collective.
So as my improv teacher gives me the notes I can receive them because they are coming from a sincere, ego-less state. The feedback is not a critique. The feedback is nourishment. It’s here how you shine, and here’s how you can shine brighter. I am seen as an individual performer; I’m seen in how I contribute to the team, and I’m seen in a way I cannot yet see myself to be.
So, even if I do have lipstick on my teeth, my classmates and this instructor will greet me with compassionate acceptance, because in order to be a success in improv, there must be a foundation of kindness, a graceful allowing of others to be as they are, for life to be as it is.
Because life is improv. Improv is life.
We are all stepping onto the dark stage of uncertainty, of mystery.
We have no control over how others respond.
We do have control on how we show up, how we respond, and then staying open to what the scene ushers forward.
The rules governing the universe of improv provide the tools to step out onto the stage of the unknown with a bit more certainty, a bit more support. And these rules resonate with how I want to show up in the world outside the theater.
My yogic Gemini self loves improv because there are guidelines to this relationship, and the guidelines relate to living a compassionate, centered, creative life.
Putting these rules into practice is difficult, but it’s the only practice I want to commit to doing, and doing well. And I feel inspired to share, because I am that type of lover who wants to spotlight and publically adore. And I share after checking to make sure my lipstick is intact and with the support from my teacher and crew rippling through my veins so wherever you are, whatever scene in your life performance, relax and improvise with flow.
*YES…And… ::
Every time I walk onto stage, I know my scene partners are going to say YES to whatever reality I spin into existence. I will say YES to them, too. AND then we will contribute and continue the momentum with adding on scene details, character notes, twists in plot.
“It’s a beautiful day!” “YES! And I am looking forward to going to the moon with you tomorrow!”
In life, we walk into every scene, every moment with the opportunity to be vibrantly present. Release resistance to this moment. Let go of expectations, judgments, agenda to say a wholehearted YES to this reality, and when we free up the energy lost to resistance, lost to complaining or wishing things were different, we can then be open to mindfully choose how to respond. We can let it be. We can change it – through actions, thoughts, a shift in energy. Or we can leave.
YES this person cut me off in traffic. AND I choose to respond in a way that reflects my highest intentions. I will let it go like water, because it’s not worth my inner peace.
*Unconditional Support ::
My job as an improv performer is to make my scene partners look brilliant, even more brilliant than they already are, because whatever they say, whatever they do, I am there to catch and support, and they are there to catch and support me. All our decisions are based on the collective good of the team. I only want to play with talented people who are affirmed in their own talents because they’re not jealous, they’re not hogs on stage, they trust their greatness and know the greatness of another on stage contributes energy, humor, and depth. In improv, we are in this together, and this connection is what makes for a fantastic show.
Just envision for a moment if the world operated this way – if we all knew our inherent awesomeness, and knew our worthiness, uniqueness, we would know that the brightness of another does not diminish our shine but uplifts the whole, and the flourishing thrive of the whole lifts us, too. Unconditional support. As my improv teacher advised before the show, “We don’t have to like each other, but we do have to love each other.”
*Do Not Give Away Your Power To The Audience ::
Show up to the best of your ability and let go of the rest.
There Are No Mistakes, Just Learning Opportunities ::
We are going to fail. We are going to bomb. And wisdom is gained when there’s an allowing for stumbles so we can cultivate greater empathy, deeper compassion for ourselves and others, and recycle that energy back into our expansion and rise.
*Let Go, Listen, Deeply Listen ::
Just like meditation or yoga, where we come home to the breath, to the moment, improv is an embodied, NOW practice that invites us to return back to the current scene. So listen. And listen attentively to dialogue, reactions, and listen to the body, too, and if the feet want to move, then step out onto the stage and change, or edit. The body knows. Listen to instinct, gut, feeling, the inner voice whispering it’s time to move forward, and I hope you do! I hope you step forward onto the stage that is life, marvelous and messy, and yearning for your own unique brilliance to add, contribute, continue the momentum of this scene.
Go shine, Rockstars.